dear soul,
we’re working out - you and i. and literally in like the heavy steel and me. for several reasons i want to talk about training with a personal trainer on here. not only because it sounds nice and feels very much self loving to have someone help you with your physical goals. it brought more attention and light into one specific area of my life: accountability.
training with ceci was in the first place about knowledge and practicability. i felt too heteronomous and determined by the schedule of my reformer pilates and yoga classes, due to traveling having access to hotel gyms felt smarter than searching for studios everywhere i go. short after i realised that it goes wayyyy beyond that.
to start with: my physical goal is a handstand by the end of the year (never set one of these as a new years resolution but you read my pov on that here) my mental goal is aligning my inner strength with my outer strength. working with her is challenging my comfort zone and boundaries. working with her is challenging my discipline and said accountability.
the shift of outer strength into inner power makes the challenge, the discipline, the accountability, the respect - all that - come from a place of self love. i am no longer punishing myself when i train - i express my strength and make it a human experience of how strong i truly am and what weight isn’t mine to carry. i express my strength for my personal wellbeing and not only when i care for other people. i lift heavy to make my life easier and longer, not to appear stronger or ease up the life of the people around me. and if that means i have to send videos everyday from the gym, that’s a responsibility i am happy to take on. it looks like i owe it to my PT when in fact, i owe it to myself. i’m the one who wants to train and ceci literally just holds me accountable. we align my goals with tangible exercises, we organise my workout around my cycle, together we create space for my true self.
same goes for your personal style. to express your authentic self through it is not only personal to you (no one knows what really feels authentic to you as looking good and feeling good are two very different things ) it’s also your responsibility. i can give you all the tools, all the tips, dress you everyday for two weeks and can be named the best stylist in the world. if you’re not doing the work on your end then your personal style will never feel authentic. you are the missing link, the connection that aligns outer and inner experience. and in that world accountability doesn’t sound like pressure anymore - that is - mes amis - pure empowerment. you have the power to bring your highest, greatest and authentic self to life, turning it into an experience in the gym but of course also through your personal style.so to break it down:
reclaim accountability as self love: it’s not proving yourself to others - it’s honouring your own desires and act on them
align outer strength with inner power: you’re capable of holding yourself, your dreams, your transformation. embodiment is a cultivation practice
let structure be your sacred container: working with a PT or a stylist isn’t about giving up your freedom - it’s choosing structure, support and intention.
style is energy in motion: your outfits is a mirror of your inner world. dressing in alignment with your true essence is not vanity - it’s visibility.
embodiment is showing up - every day: your body doesn’t lie and neither does your style. the key to empowerment is consistency over perfection. be present.
little did i know that re-starting my gym journey would have such a great impact on my overall wellbeing. yet, it’s just another example of what i tell my clients and my community online every time: everything is connected - we just have to be present and zoom out to see the dots. working with a personal trainer and going back to the gym was a re-turn and another layer of my spiritual practice that i didn't see coming to that extend. discipline becomes devotion, vanity becomes visibility, authority becomes alignment. and as much as muscle memory is a thing, i re-membered myself within the past 4 weeks more and it feels like my vision has cleared up.
i want to see you,
L